Life of a Lab Rat

The University library is undergoing some sort of review, which I gather is business-speak for we're throwing stuff out. Basically,

Low demand material will be transferred to Storage and will be available on request. We will retain unique titles in the University Library collection and rare materials will be transferred to the Rare Books collection in Fisher Library.

. . . never to be seen again, probably.

One of my spies wrote to the Cage's 'Academics' mailing list, informing us of this development:

At the moment, it's a popularity contest... the sexy, colourful books get to live in up the new palace, but the unfashionable are left on the shelf with only the company of the other unloved and spiders.

As you can see, my spies are wasted in this job. Anyway,

The librarians have their irons in the fire to prepare for branding books as being for either a) inclusion in the new, sparkly rooms where they will be eagerly, yet gently, caressed by adoring student hands or b) relegation to the dungeons of the Fisher stack where their hearts will be slowly devoured by silverfish.

To which a Certain Academic responded,

I would have thought there was plenty of eager yet gentle caressing by student hands that takes place in Fisher stack too, from what you hear...

which is an insight into Sydney Life that frankly, you're probably better off not having. Especially when you read things like Having fun isn’t hard when you’ve got a library card!. It's a jungle out there, it really is.